‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ Has Nothing to Do With Love

Valentine’s Day used to be about roses and chocolates; this year, it’s about bondage sex and psychological abuse. This Friday, the highly controversial Fifty Shades of Grey will debut in theaters across the country. And while the film’s book namesake is purportedly “erotic romance,” in reality, the movie glorifies sexual violence, dominance and psychological abuse.

According to one report, 20 minutes of the 100-minute film are scenes of graphic sex. And the film carries an “R” rating not only for “graphic nudity” but also for “unusual behavior,” which entails BDSM sex scenes (BD=Bondage and Discipline; DS=Dominance and Submission; SM=Sadism and Masochism).

Religion and culture expert Dr. Alex McFarland (alexmcfarland.com), says the movie is the latest installation in a cultural trend that advances a skewed definition of love.

“Few things are as unthinkable as promoting violent sex and psychological abuse in the name of ‘romance,'” McFarland said. “But it’s hardly surprising that our culture has come to this point when we recognize that for years, sex has been glorified as the ultimate standard of love. And not sex within the God-ordained protection of marriage between one man and one woman, but sex that is simply a means of taking what we want from someone else to gratify ourselves. Fifty Shades of Grey goes beyond even this twisted view of sex and love and elevates sexual abuse as acceptable. This is not only a tragic and dangerous depiction of love but also one of the reasons young people today are growing up with little understanding of real love, mistaking emotions for the sacrificial and often inconvenient commitment love calls for.”

The film is widely considered borderline pornography, and central to the plot is a “contract” between the main characters to allow a dominant/submissive sexual relationship.

“Any relationship that seeks to control someone seeks to use that person for one’s own gain,” McFarland continued. “If we want an example of true love, and the type of love we should aim to mirror, we will find it in the sacrificial love of Jesus Christ, who laid down his life for us, not to control us but to invite us into relationship with Him. First John 4:10 says, ‘In this is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the atoning sacrifice for our sins.’

“Fifty Shades of Grey sends the message that ‘if you love me, you will willingly submit to my abuse.’ But love such as God displays sends the message, ‘I place your needs above my own and seek your well-being above my own.’ This Valentine’s Day, if young people are looking for an example of love, they won’t find it in Fifty Shades of Grey. Where they will find it is in the words of 1 Corinthians 13: ‘Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking … It always protects’ (vv. 4-5, 7, NIV).”